The Dance of Energies: How Polarity of Feminine and Masculine Energy Can Affect Marital Bliss (Copy)
Hey there, friends! Let's talk about something that could make a huge difference in your marriage—it sure made a big difference in mine! Marriage is a partnership—a dance between two people navigating life's joys and challenges together. This dance often involves the interplay of feminine and masculine energies, each bringing unique strengths and qualities to the relationship. Understanding and harmonizing these energies can spice up your marriage and bring a lot more fun into your life! This may sound a bit woo-woo, but believe me, it’s all about making your relationship more harmonious and connected. Ready to dive in?
Before we get into how these energies impact your relationship, it's essential to understand what they are. Feminine and masculine energies are not about gender per se—they exist in both females and males, but they are about qualities and traits that predominate in each gender.
What is Feminine and Masculine Energies
Feminine Energy is all about nurturing, empathy, intuition, and creativity. It’s about enjoying pleasure, receiving help, and sharing feelings. Think of it as the heart and soul—it’s about being, feeling, and connecting. It’s about flow and receptivity that focuses on relationships and emotional bonds. This energy is sourced from the heart.
Masculine Energy is often associated with qualities like assertiveness, logic, action, and strength. It's about doing, achieving, and providing. Think of it as the driving force that pushes forward and makes things happen. Masculine energy craves respect, admiration, and appreciation for what he provides. This energy is from the mind.
Both men and women have these energies but in different measures and expressions. The magic happens when these energies complement each other and attract, which is called polarity. And finding the right balance of polarity in a relationship can make all the difference—like a beautiful dance, creating harmony and deeper connection.
The Role of Polarity in Relationships
Polarity is the magnetic attraction between two opposing energies—Feminine and Masculine. In the context of marriage, that polarity can enhance intimacy and connection. When one partner embodies more feminine energy and the other more masculine energy, the natural differences can complement each other, creating a dynamic and balanced relationship that brings you closer together—just like how the magnet works!
Have you ever wondered why some couples seem to have an effortless connection, while others struggle to find harmony? I only recently heard about this topic of polarity. I got very interested in this topic and made a study of it. And what a fascinating and eye-opening study it has been—because you see, this sort of thing was not taught to me, nor had I seen it being modeled by my mother! My parents fought constantly in their marriage, and my husband and I experienced a lot of struggles in our marriage too.
Had I understood this polarity dance, I could’ve had a lot less conflicts and heartache, and much more happiness and fun during our 39 years of marriage! Ladies, let me share with you a secret—we women have tremendous power in our relationships when we apply feminine energy. When we are in this energy, we receive the love of our husbands and receive his help, and when we prioritize our pleasure and take care of ourselves to feel good, and when we feel good, we do good for others to meet their needs too. Women are the relationship keepers of our home, and often the tone of the home environment is set by how the woman feels. Remember the adage,” happy wife, happy home”?! So even if your husbands are not on board yet with this polarity dance, we as women can still change our marriage relationship to more bliss by applying our feminine energy. And the secret is to take care of yourself and take pleasure in yourself—-because a happy wife makes a happy home!
Okay, so are you on board and want to know how this polarity can work for you?
The Benefit and Impact of Polarity on Marital Bliss
When the feminine and masculine energies are balanced and respected, your relationship can thrive. Here are some benefits:
Deeper Connection: Polarity between masculine and feminine energies creates attraction and chemistry in a relationship. When one partner embodies more masculine energy and the other more feminine, there's a natural pull between them. This dynamic can spark passion and keep the relationship exciting; understanding and honoring this polarity are crucial for enhancing intimacy and closeness.
Increased Harmony: A healthy balance of these energies within a relationship leads to harmony. If both partners are too much in their masculine or feminine energy, it can cause friction. For instance, if both are in their masculine energy, they might clash and compete, while if both are in their feminine energy, there might be a lack of direction and initiative, so it’s imperative to balance the energies to reduce conflicts and misunderstandings where each partner feels valued and respected for their unique contributions to the relationship.
Greater Fulfillment: Embracing and balancing energies can lead to a more fulfilling and satisfying relationship. Because masculine energy tends to be more direct and solution-oriented in communication, while feminine energy is more empathetic and nurturing, it’s important to understand and value these differences. By doing so, communication can be improved and both partners feel heard and acknowledged.
Strengthened Partnership: A balanced relationship fosters a stronger partnership. When partners honor and support each other's energy, they create a supportive environment for growth. The masculine energy can provide strength and protection, allowing the feminine energy to flourish and express itself creatively. Conversely, the feminine energy can offer intuition and emotional support, helping the masculine energy feel grounded and purposeful. This blend of energies creates a resilient and dynamic bond that can withstand challenges and changes.
Enhancing Polarity: Here are some ways to enhance and balance polarity in your marriage:
Self-Awareness
Recognize your dominant energy and understand how it affects your behavior and interactions. Reflect on moments of conflict or harmony in your relationship and consider how your energies might be playing a role.
Appreciation
Appreciate and honor the differences in your partner's energy. Instead of seeing them as opposites that clash, view them as complementary forces that can create a more balanced and fulfilling relationship.
Flexibility
Be flexible and willing to adapt. Sometimes, you might need to tap into your feminine energy to nurture your partner, and other times, you might need to harness your masculine energy to take action and provide support.
Practice Presence
Being present with your partner is crucial. For the masculine energy, this might mean being fully engaged and attentive. For the feminine energy, it might mean being emotionally available and connected.
Release Your Feminine Energy—for more marital bliss!
Accessing Feminine Energy
So how can we, especially as we age (because after menopause, women produce less estrogen and more testosterone) in order to keep our feminine energy vibrant and juicy? Here are some ways to access and enhance feminine energy:
Self-Care Rituals: Love yourself by indulging in activities that make you feel pampered and feel good. This could be a luxurious bath, a massage, or simply taking time to enjoy your favorite hobbies. Practice slow living by slowing down and enjoying your day with mindfulness and being in the moment. Getting enough beauty sleep each night is very important!
Creative Expression: Tap into creative activities like home decorating, cooking, painting, dancing, or crafting. These activities can help you reconnect with your playful and imaginative side. Tap into your childlike state and live in the present!
Movement and Dance: Incorporate gentle, flowing movements like yoga, tai chi, or dance into your daily routine. Stay open, free, and joyful in your body. These practices help you connect with your body and enhance your feminine energy. Get into your body, not in your head!
Nature Connection: Spend time in nature, soaking in the beauty and tranquility. Breathe deeply. Nature has a way of recharging our feminine energy and bringing a sense of peace and joy. Walk in nature or hug your pets!
Nurturing Relationships: Foster deep, nurturing relationships with friends and family. Ask for and receive help, and be playful. These connections are vital for emotional health and well-being. Use a kind tone of voice, let go of control, and ease into soft, flowing, and relaxing energy.
Things to be careful of that destroys feminine energy:
Not staying grounded in your emotions and reacting to others emotions,
Not setting personal boundaries for seeking your man’s approval or people-pleasing,
Try to change your man by controlling, complaining, or criticizing—instead focus on living your best life in the areas of physical, intellectual, emotional, and spiritual growth.
Not being in touch with your feelings and needs—feminine energy is sourced from the heart; so move your awareness from the head to the heart.
Not giving yourself structure and routines to support your feminine flow state—whereby you do not have enough time and energy for your self-care and growth.
By embracing these practices, especially as we get older and in our senior years, we can live more on our feminine energy side with vitality and juiciness and live our best life. We can provide an inspiration for younger women too as they witness how their mothers or grandmothers are living their life to the fullest with vitality and zest!
Helping Your Man Flourish in His Masculine Energy
As our husband ages, it’s equally important to support him in maintaining his masculine energy because in andropause, older men produce more estrogen and lose testosterone. But you can help your man flourish in his masculine energy by:
Encouragement: Encourage him to pursue his passions and interests. Whether it’s a hobby, sport, or a new project, being engaged in meaningful activities helps keep his masculine energy strong.
Respect and Appreciation: Show respect and appreciation for his efforts and strengths. Acknowledging his contributions and thank him for the things he does to make you happy. This reinforces his sense of purpose and he feels deeply valued.
Physical Activity: Encourage regular physical activity. Exercise not only maintains physical health but also boosts testosterone which gives him more confidence and energy.
Shared Goals: Set shared goals and work on projects together. This not only strengthens your bond but also gives him a sense of achievement and purpose.
Open Communication: Foster a supportive vibe by talking and sharing your feelings and wants in a soft, respectful way, and listening to his needs without interrupting.
My Personal Journey—Embracing the Dance
As someone who has been married for nearly 39 years, I've seen firsthand how the dance of polarity plays out, and understanding the dance of feminine and masculine energies has been a game-changer. My husband and I are learning to appreciate our differences and use them to strengthen our bond. Embracing my nurturing, empathetic nature while honoring his assertive, protective qualities has created a balance that enhances our relationship. I had not realized that I had been operating my life for too many years in my masculine energy—controlling to make things happen, just surviving, not thriving! This caused a lot of friction and conflicts in our marriage. Since I have been learning about the feminine energy, and receiving help and trust, by letting go of control, our marriage has been transformative. My daily practice is now to get in touch with my feelings and ask myself what I am feeling. Once I identify my feelings, I ask myself what I want. Suppose there’s something I need to communicate to my husband that he can help solve my problems or just to empathically listen. In that case, I express it in a soft feminine way with authentic vulnerability. This in turn arouses in him his action-oriented masculine energy to provide and protect, to be my hero, rising in him to meet my needs and wants which is naturally hard-wired into males.
I have learned that communicating openly about our needs and supporting each other in expressing our natural energies, has not only deepened our connection but also increased our harmony and fulfillment in our relationship. We are learning that honoring our polarity is key to marital bliss!
Here are some practical ways and real-life examples that you may find helpful to embrace these energies in your marriage:
Real-Life Examples and Practical Tips
Communication–In communicating, men may feel defensive, angry, or even passive when they feel criticized, controlled, nagged, or constantly complaining by their partner. You may think that you were right and his negative response was unwarranted, and it also may be that his fears or insecurities triggered his response. Regardless, we need to approach communication with our man softly, with empathy, and hold space for his emotional safety. Here are some practical tips to try.
Use Feminine Energy: First, get in touch with your emotions, and share what you are feeling. Are you feeling sad, happy, afraid, frustrated, etc? Share with your partner what feelings came up for you and express them. Then practice active listening and hold space for his emotions as well. Thank him for listening to you and appreciate his efforts.
The script you may try:
“I have something to share, would now be a good time or when?” Make an appointment to share so you are not bombarding him at the wrong time.
“I feel….”. Feel your feelings and express them.
“The way you did it made me feel….”
“If you’re willing, we could try it this way…..and it’ll feel really good for me.”
“Thank you for listening, I really appreciate it.”
Using Masculine Energy: Being clear, direct, and offering solutions while maintaining a supportive stance.
Shared Responsibilities:
Divide tasks in a way that respects each other’s strengths. For instance, one partner may handle organizing and planning (masculine energy), while the other focuses on creating a nurturing home environment (feminine energy).
Quality Time:
Spend time together in ways that allow both energies to flourish. For example, take turns planning date nights, balancing activities that cater to both adventurous (masculine) and relaxing (feminine) experiences.
Be playful and have fun with each other. Be open and receptive and try new things—remember to have a growth mindset!
Support Each Other’s Growth:
Encourage each other to explore activities that cultivate both energies. This might mean supporting your partner’s career ambitions (masculine) while also fostering their creative pursuits (feminine).
Now, take a moment to think about the energies at play in your relationship. By understanding and embracing the polarity of feminine and masculine energies, you can bring more harmony, intimacy, and joy into your marriage. Embrace your natural energy and encourage your partner to do the same. Talk about how you can support each other in balancing these energies. Remember, the dance of feminine and masculine energies is a powerful tool for enhancing marital bliss—-you don’t want to just survive but thrive in your marriage! So, let's keep dancing and nurturing our relationships with love and understanding. Your marriage is a beautiful journey, so, why not start today?
Which is your favorite quote about marriage?
"A great marriage is not when the 'perfect couple' comes together. It is when an imperfect couple learns to enjoy their differences." – Dave Meurer
"Marriage is not about age; it’s about finding the right person." – Sophia Bush
"A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person." – Mignon McLaughlin
"Marriage is not just spiritual communion; it is also remembering to take out the trash." – Joyce Brothers
"The best thing to hold onto in life is each other." – Audrey Hepburn
"Marriage is the golden ring in a chain whose beginning is a glance and whose ending is eternity." – Kahlil Gibran
"Love is not something you feel. It’s something you do." – David Wilkerson
"Marriage is the most natural state of man, and the state in which you will find solid happiness." – Benjamin Franklin
"A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers." – Ruth Bell Graham
"Chains do not hold a marriage together. It is threads, hundreds of tiny threads, which sew people together through the years." – Simone Signoret